Sunday, July 23, 2006

Working Adult Camp

I just went back from a working adult camp organized by my church at Fraser Hill, Pahang, Malaysia. Before the camp, I was having a tough time in my workplace. My work is not meeting the expectation. I thought I have put my best effort on it, yet it is not meeting the requirement or expectation. Frustration and disappointment start to attack me. I am planning to resign or in other word - give up. It is kind of defeated by the challenge of my work.

As a negative person, I can extend a little frustration and disappointment in life into meaningless life. That is why recently I feel so tired to do anything. I try to find satisfaction from computer game, Internet, etc but I failed. All of these doesn't kindle my passion. I feel like a walking corpse.

In the camp, I was no passion to relate myself to anybody too. The purpose I participate is to take a break of my boring life. During the camp, pastor mentioned a lot of my symptom. He said I need to check my relationship with God. Pastor is correct. It was a long period of time since I last read bible. It was even longer since I last pray. I think this should be the source of my problem. Because when I fill my mind with the Lord Jesus Christ, it make more sense to live. In the bible said:

(Ecclesiastes 1:1-11) The words of the Teacher, son of David, king in Jerusalem:
"Meaningless! Meaningless!" says the Teacher.
"Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless."

What does man gain from all his labor
at which he toils under the sun?

Generations come and generations go,
but the earth remains forever.

The sun rises and the sun sets,
and hurries back to where it rises.

The wind blows to the south
and turns to the north;
round and round it goes,
ever returning on its course.

All streams flow into the sea,
yet the sea is never full.

To the place the streams come from,
there they return again.

All things are wearisome,
more than one can say.

The eye never has enough of seeing,
nor the ear its fill of hearing.

What has been will be again,
what has been done will be done again;
there is nothing new under the sun.

Is there anything of which one can say,
"Look! This is something new"?
It was here already, long ago;
it was here before our time.

There is no remembrance of men of old,
and even those who are yet to come
will not be remembered by those who follow.

(Ecclesiastes 12:13-14) Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter:
Fear God and keep his commandments,
for this is the whole duty of man.

For God will bring every deed into judgment,
including every hidden thing,
whether it is good or evil.

Though everything is meaningless, God is the only exception. He is meaningful because he is going to judge what we did in this meaningless world at the end of the day.

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